Trust and love
by Whispering Lillies
Summary: Inuyasha sneaks off to finally tell Kikyo goodbye for good. Kagome follows however and sees something she wishes she hadn't. Now Inuyasha must figure out how to be forgiven.
1. How could you?

**Trust and Love**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, unfortunately, and I also don't own the songs "Leave the Pieces" by The Wreckers. Yes i know i need to update my Twilight story and that is next on my list! This has been on my computer FOREVER though and i've finally finshed editing it so it's being posted. Please review and ENJOY!! ^_^**

**Part 1: How could you?**

I didn't care anymore. He had gone off to visit Kikyo once again. I had gotten up in the middle of the night and discovered them together. The only thing I could make out was an "I love you". It was Kikyo who said it but I didn't get a chance to hear his answer. I had run off.

_You're not sure that you love me_

_But you're not sure enough to let me go_

_Baby it ain't fair, you know_

It isn't fair! How could he still love her! She died fifty years ago and he still can't let go! He needs to move on! At first I just wanted to punch something which only made me run faster. I don't know where I'm running. I just want to get away from the sight that is burned into my mind's eye.

_To just keep me hangin' 'round_

_You say you don't want to hurt me_

_Don't wanna see my tears_

_So why are you still standin' here_

_Just a'watchin' me drown_

I want to just collapse to the ground in a broken heap and cry but I know if I do that he'll catch up with me. He'll whisper sweet nothings in my ear and apologize a dozen times. He'll say he cares for me and I know I'll forgive him. I always forgive him, every time he runs off to Kikyo I tell him it's okay and that I understand. It's not okay! My heart can't take it anymore! It's slowly shattering into little pieces and soon there will be nothing left. I have to get away before it's too late.

_And it's all right_

_Yeah, I'll be fine_

_Don't worry bout this heart a mine_

_Just take your love and hit the road_

_There's nothin you can do or say_

_You're gonna break my heart anyway_

_So just leave the pieces when you go_

I heard him yell my name. I can't stop. Not now. If I look back I won't be able to go forward. I won't be strong enough to resist those gorgeous amber eyes or the pleading in his voice. He'll just break another piece of my heart. I'll cry but I won't take him back. Not this time. If he wants to go run off with Kikyo then let him! For a split second anger overcomes my sadness but it doesn't last long. I answer his desperate calls with a shouted "SIT!" and keep running. Tears unwillingly start coursing down my face.

_Now you can drag out the heartache_

_Baby, you could make it quick_

He wasn't making this easy. I can still hear him following me even after the 'sit'. Why is he so desperate? I shake my head to try and clear my thoughts. I relished the brief moment of emptiness before that horrible image came back. He was in HER arms. He wasn't trying to get away but seemed to be enjoying it! The tears came down faster. I tried to wipe them away with the back of my hands but it didn't help. My breath started coming in ragged gasps. I know I can't keep this pace up much longer but I want to put as much distance between me and him as possible.

_Really just get it over with_

_And just let me move on_

_Don't concern yourself_

_With this mess you left for me_

I finally collapsed on the ground when a light rain started falling. The soft sound of the rain hitting the leaves helped to calm me slightly. I couldn't hear Inuyasha anymore. Maybe he finally gave up, I sure hope so. If I see him with Kikyo one more time I think I'll die, but that won't happen now because my mind is made up. Maybe this wouldn't have happened if he wouldn't lie about going off to see Kikyo. I only wanted to know the truth. Maybe it wouldn't hurt as much if he had told the truth. I didn't want him to follow me after I ran off tonight and yet I feel as if he's abandoned me. Why? How can I possibly still love him? After everything he's put me through I just want to move on with my life.

_I can clean it up, you see_

_Just as long as you're gone_

I have a wondrous family and awesome friends. I can make it without him. So why do I feel so empty? It's as if my heart was torn out of my chest. I lost all sense of time as I lay here not moving. Suddenly a pair of strong arms enveloped me. I looked down at the clawed hands numbly. He came? I thought I didn't matter? Maybe I still don't, this could just be a hallucination or better yet this could all just be a dream. What is he muttering about? I don't really care anymore. I started thrashing and telling my captor to let me go. His grip was tight and he refused to budge.

"Kagome! Kagome please! Let me explain! You didn't see the whole thing!" The whole thing? What is he talking about?!

"I did too! You were hugging her! You were going to admit you loved her! I knew you still loved her! I'm so stupid!" I screamed. I cried. But I wasn't going to just take this stupid boy back. Finally he let his arms drop. I took off at a sprint again. My legs burned but I kept going, I HAD to keep going. I heard Inuyasha start shouting at me. He hadn't seemed to realize that he'd released me.

_You not makin up your mind_

_Is killin me and wastin time_

_I need so much more than that_

I kept going and I never looked back. I ran as far as I could go before fainting.

**This is part 1 of 3 and i will try to update later this week!! Depends on how much physics homework it get....man i hate physics!!!! Please push the button i know is somewhere that says review!!!**

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	2. Torn

**Trust and Love**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, unfortunately, and I also don't own the song "Torn" by Natalie Imbruglia**

**Yeah! I didn't take a super long time to update!!!!! Thanks to Mirrored In My Mind for the review!! To all you people who put this story on your favorite list PLEASE REVIEW!!!! I enjoy hearing your comments! ^_^**

**Part 2: Torn**

I woke up groggily. I tried to sit up and it took a couple tries which shows how far I had run. My legs ached horribly and I slowly became aware of my surroundings. I was on the forest floor where I had fallen last night. Everything from the night before came rushing back to the front of my mind.

_I thought I saw a man brought to life_

_He was warm, he came around like he was dignified_

_He showed me what it was like to cry_

I attempted to focus on the situation at hand but my mind kept wandering back to Inuyasha. All the times I sat him, all the times we laughed and all the times we fought. We went through a lot together and I hate how he just threw me away like that! Maybe though I threw him away? I can't think like that! If I do I won't be able to look at myself. To know that I had almost gotten everything anyone ever wishes for, friends, family and someone who loves me, then threw it away. Tears sprung into my eyes but I refused to let them fall this time.

_Well you couldn't be that man that I adored_

_You don't seem to know, don't seem to care what your heart is for_

Maybe he wasn't Inuyasha. Maybe he was some sort of evil clone or Naraku disguised as Inuyasha. The Inuyasha I know would never do all those things would he? After reflecting for what seemed an eternity I decided to get up off the cold ground. So far it wasn't going well. I hadn't realized until now how far and fast I'd run. My legs are killing me!! I fell down again half expecting to be caught by a pair of strong arms. None came to encircle my waist and I landed on my butt. It wasn't all a dream! MY Inuyasha really did kiss Kikyo!

_But I don't know him anymore_

_There's nothing where he used to lie_

I managed to stand up and weakly started to walk. I have no idea where the nearest village is and frankly I don't care, as long as Inuyasha ISN'T there. He has the right to be happy and if Kikyo makes him happy then I hope they have a good life together. I no longer have any meaning to him so I just need to stay out of Inuyasha's life.

I don't know how much time has flown by. Everything has been a blank. When did I last eat? Have I seen anyone? I've been numb on the inside trying to erase Inuyasha from my mind, to convince myself I don't love him. My mind hasn't fully wrapped itself around the idea that I have no place in Inuyasha's life anymore. I can't remember anything from the past few days except that one scene in the woods with Kikyo. And worse, Inuyasha hasn't come running trying to apologize. I thought maybe it was a misunderstanding but I guess I was wrong. I'm always so wrong!

I turned my head slightly hearing my name. Hearing **him **call my name. I must be hearing things now. The only thought I could manage is that I'm going crazy. But there it is again and he seems desperate and hurt. Hurt? Hurt! He has no right to be HURT! He got what he wanted and what was I left with?! Nothing that's what! Tears started to form but I blinked them back. I came jolting to reality when a hand grabbed one of my wrists. The person turned me around so that we were face to face. I looked into deep amber pools amazed. All the emotions I've been covering with numbness came back full force. This time I couldn't stop the tears that flooded down my face.

_My conversation has run dry_

_That's what's going on, nothings fine I'm torn._

_I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel_

His eyes always make me speechless and right now I don't have much to say to him anyways. Instead of looking at him I turn my head away. Sighing he takes his free hand and cups my chin forcing me to look at him. He looked hungry, desperate, hurt and ready to sleep for a week.

"Where do you think you're going?" he asked. I didn't know how to answer. Truthfully I have no clue where I'm going.

_I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel_

_I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor_

He had Kikyo. I thought that was what he wanted. He always ran off to her. He was in love with her 50 years ago and I thought he still was. But now looking deep into his amber eyes I'm not so sure anymore. Doubt blossomed in my mind, possibly he really did love me…No! Stop! I have to push those thoughts out of my mind, they won't get me anywhere. If I start thinking he loves me it will only be more painful when he says goodbye.

_Illusion never changed into something real_

_I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn_

_You're a little late, I'm already torn_

Inuyasha can't fix this, this hole where my heart used to be. More tears streamed down my face unchecked. I feel so weak, crying like this in front of him for the umpteenth time. I saw worry appear in his eyes. Why? I was just a shard detector. He's always saying that and last night he proved it. I obviously didn't mean anything to him so why should he care? My mind was already confused enough but now I feel as if my head is going to explode any minute. How can he lead me on this way?! I….I….I love him!!

_So I guess the fortune teller's right_

_Should have seen just what was there_

_And not some holy light_

I used to be amazed when I looked into his eyes. They held such pain and yet could be joyful. He was always there when I fell to call me an idiot but it never felt like he really meant it. All the hurtful words we've exchanged, I thought they were his way of expressing himself. I understand that he never really had anyone to look to after his mother died. I always thought he wanted Kikyo, his first true love, who has always held a part of his heart. However now that the seed of doubt has been planted in my mind it's extremely hard to get rid of.

_To crawl beneath my veins and now_

_I don't care, I have no luck, I don't_

_Miss it all that much_

_There's just so many things that I_

_Can't touch, I'm torn_

He started to talk. It sounded rushed, and all the while his eyes bored holes into mine. I wasn't paying much attention though. How could I? He could never tell me the truth before about going to see Kikyo and now he just wants his shard detector back.

"Kagome! KAGOME!" I was jolted back to reality by Inuyasha screaming my name two feet from my face.

"Damn! Will you just listen for a second!" He sounded exceedingly desperate.

_I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel_

_I'm cold and I shamed bound and broken on the floor_

_On the floor_

_Illusion never changed into something_

_real_

I decided to give him my undivided attention. He noticed that I seemed to be paying better attention and started his explanation over.

"Kagome I told Kikyo GOODBYE. It's over with her. She's part of my past and now I need to move on to my future." He had a hopeful look in his golden eyes. Could it be true? Did he seriously leave Kikyo or was he just lying his ass off hoping to avoid a couple sits? I mean he did love Kikyo. Right?

He saw the slight doubt and confusion in my eyes. He gave me a little shake when I turned my face and stared at the ground. I'm so confused!! Did I get everything wrong? Was it always me and not Kikyo? I looked back into his eyes.

_I'm wide awake and I can see the_

_Perfect sky is torn_

_You're a little late and I'm already torn_

Then the rash hanyou did the last thing I ever expected him to do. The last time it happened was a fluke. I did it to keep him from changing into a full demon forever and afterwards we never mentioned it again. This time was no fluke. He bent down and kissed me! Inuyasha kissed me! I tried to push him away at first but he refused to move. Maybe he really did love me! Finally I stopped resisting him and gave in. It was so wonderful!

When he finally pulled away he smiled. And whispered an 'I love you' in my ear before scooping me up in his arms and jumping through the trees towards the village.

**WOOT! Now push the button at the bottom of the screen...I know it's there somewhere...but I can't see it.....**


	3. Sorry

**Trust and Love**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, unfortunately, and I also don't own the song "Sorry" by Buckcherry. This is the last chapter!! So sad but true! Maybe I'll post another Inuyasha story soon....I have plenty of plot bunnies to choose from....Anyways hope you like the last chappie of Trust and Love!! Thanks to those who reviewed and try to review this chappie too pleaz!!! ^_^**

**Part 3: Sorry **

**Inuyasha's POV**

I saw Kikyo's soul stealers gliding through the trees waiting for me to follow them. I had been waiting to meet Kikyo for a couple weeks now. I wanted to tell her something very important and the sooner the better.

_Oh I had a lot to say_

_Was thinking on my time away_

The last time Kagome went home I did a lot of thinking which is strange for me. I thought of Kagome and Kikyo. They both mean a lot to me. Kagome is like my sun and Kikyo the moon but I also realized that the sham walking around that looked like Kikyo wasn't the Kikyo I fell in love with fifty years ago. Over time I have learned to live without Kikyo but Kagome drove me crazy every time she left! When I first met Kagome I couldn't understand why it bothered me so much when she went away but now I've finally figured it out.

_I missed you and things weren't the same_

_Cause everything inside it never comes out right_

I've tried to tell Kagome several times but I always wimp out at the last moment and end up calling her something dreadful which doesn't help at all.

_And when I see you cry it makes me wanna die_

More often than not I make her cry. I hate it when she cries. Then to make matters worse I run off to Kikyo without telling anyone. It breaks her heart I can see that now. It's not fair to her and I can't hurt her anymore. The easy part was making my decision next came the hard part. I had to talk with Kikyo and then with Kagome. I've never been very good with words and I could already feel a lump in my throat at the thought of telling Kikyo goodbye for good.

_I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue_

_I'm sorry about all the things I said to you_

_And I know I can't take it back _

I reached a clearing and as expected found the priestess I was looking for. I approached slowly making sure she knew I was there.

"Hello Inuyasha." Her voice was colder than I remember it all those years ago when we first met. I thought I heard a small noise in some bushes but ignored it instead focusing on what I had to do.

"Kikyo, I came to say goodbye. I still love you but I can't go to hell with you. I have a future now." I said it so softly that at first I thought she didn't hear me. Before I could repeat myself her eyes hardened and she stepped closer all the while looking at something in the bushes behind me.

"I love you Inuyasha." She startled me with how loud she said it compared to my soft words. I didn't have time to react before she hugged me tight. That's when a horrid realization dawned on me.

_I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds_

At the same time her arms wrapped around me I heard a gasp come from the bushes. Kagome ran out of her hiding place, tears streaming down her face, into the forest.

"Kagome!" Dammit!" Kagome must've misunderstood what happened. She obviously didn't hear my little closing but only Kikyo's declaration. The worst part is that Kikyo was still clutching me to her so I couldn't just run off.

"Kikyo let go! I love Kagome!" This startled her and I took the opportunity to run after Kagome. The last I saw of Kikyo was her standing in the little clearing shocked by my words and looking absolutely devastated. This isn't how I imagined our goodbyes to be! What ended up happening was unfair to Kikyo and tore at the part of my heart she would always hold.

_And baby the way you make my world _

_Go round_

_And I just wanted to say I'm sorry._

The only thing I concentrated on was Kagome. I love Kagome! Why can't she see that? I know I never out right told her but she can be smart, sometimes, so I thought she'd figure it out! I caught a glimpse of a white shirt in front of me and sped up slightly hoping to catch her, she did have a head start after all. Out of reflex I yelled her name. That turned out not to be such a bright idea. Next thing I knew she had screamed that vile, evil word. Sit. I immediately did a face plant out of the trees and into the hard dirt. The spell seemed to last longer than usual and when I was free I quickly picked up Kagome's scent and started towards her again.

_This time I think I'm to blame_

_It's harder t get through the days_

_We get older and blame turns to _

_Shame_

I kept running in the direction Kagome went. When she's mad she sure can run fast. Then at the worst possible moment it started to rain. Just great. I desperately tried to follow Kagome's scent but the damn rain was washing it all away. Pretty soon it would be completely gone and I would be back at square one. I didn't want to leave Kagome out in the rain without any weapons or shelter leaving her open to an attack or sickness. If anything happens to her I will never forgive myself.

After running a little longer I caught sight of something green and white. I rushed over and found Kagome lying on the ground. She was shivering, wet and caked with mud. The rain finally decided to stop and I sat down on the ground next to Kagome not caring in the least that I was getting muddy. Gently I pulled her into my lap so we could talk. She was still conscious but wouldn't say anything to me. I started muttering about her taking off like that.

_Cause everything inside it never_

_Comes out right_

_And when I see you cry it makes me_

_Wanna die_

Suddenly Kagome started thrashing around most likely hoping to escape but my arms held her tight to me. Why was she so desperate to get away from me? Maybe she doesn't love me. Maybe she just stayed with me because I make a good guard dog. No! I refuse to think like that!

"Kagome! Kagome please! Let me explain! You didn't see the whole thing!" I tried to reason with her. If I can only get her to see that she has everything wrong then maybe things will turn out all right.

"I did too! You were hugging her! You were going to admit you loved her! I knew you still loved her! I'm so stupid!" Tears were running down her face as she screamed at me. Her words hurt. They hurt terribly. Without realizing it my arms had dropped releasing her from my grasp. She took the opening and started running. I yelled at her to come back but she didn't stop, she didn't even look back. That hurt the most. I loved her and I just screwed up bad. So bad in fact that this time I'm not sure she'll take me back.

_I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue_

_I'm sorry about all the things I said to_

_You_

_And I know I can't take it back_

I lost Kagome. All night long I searched for her, it didn't help that the rain started up again, but I couldn't find her. The others must be wondering what happened to the two of us but I don't care. They can take care of themselves for a couple days. I refuse to just abandon Kagome out here. That wench can't take care of herself. She knows better than to run off without a weapon, when I get my hands on her she's getting the lecture of her life! After I apologize, confess my love and make up of course.

_I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds_

_And baby the way you make my world_

_Go round_

_And I just wanted to say I'm sorry_

It was towards midday when I finally caught sight of Kagome. I hadn't slept or eaten all night and damn I'm tired! Still I won't rest until I get Kagome back. As I drew closer I got a better look at Kagome and boy did she look like hell. Obviously she fell asleep on the ground last night after running as fast as she could. She was swaying slightly as she walked, as if she was drunk. She didn't seem to be very aware of her surroundings either.

_Every single day I think about how we_

_Came all this way_

_The sleepless nights and the tears you cried_

"Kagome!" She must've heard me because her head turned slightly. I yelled her name again. Hoping she wouldn't sit me into oblivion. She still wouldn't acknowledge me so I grabbed one of her wrists and spun her around to look at me. As soon as we made eye contact tears streamed unchecked down her cheeks. I have no idea what to do! I need to consult with Miroku on this when I see him next. Right now I need to think of something to do and quick! She turned her face away from me and with a sigh I cupped her chin in my hand and forced her to look at me. Her chocolate brown eyes left me speechless for a second. They were filled with hurt and betrayal.

_It's never too late to make it right_

_Oh yeah sorry_

"Where do you think you're going?" Honestly where did she think she was going? There are no villages around for miles and a demon could've attacked her! She didn't answer me and I began to get worried. Was she hurt? I didn't think so but she wouldn't answer me, she just kept crying. I started to tell her what happened. It was rushed and Kagome didn't seem to be paying any attention to me even though she was looking straight into my eyes.

_I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue_

_I'm sorry about all the things I said to you_

_And I know I can't take it back_

"Kagome! KAGOME!" Dammit would she just pay attention to me for one second! It can't be that hard to do! She looked startled for a moment as my loud yell rang in her ears.

"Damn! Will you just listen for a second!" My voice sounded desperate even to my ears. She finally seemed to be listening so I took full advantage of the opportunity. I will not screw this up again.

"Kagome I told Kikyo goodbye. It's over with her. She's part of my past and now I need to move on to the future." I saw the confusion in her eyes immediately. She obviously didn't believe a word I had just uttered and I refuse to repeat myself. I can still see Kikyo's pained face as I left her. That would haunt me forever but it was the right thing to do. I have a second chance that I will not throw away.

Kagome looked at the ground and so I gave her a little shake to gain her attention. Kagome is always saying that actions speak louder than words… out of nowhere an idea popped into my head. It had been so wonderful the first time so why not try it again? Except this time it won't be a life or death situation. Hopefully it will be even better the second time. This train of thought made me very anxious to try out my idea. Before I even realized what I was doing I kissed Kagome! It just felt so right to have her lips crushed against mine.

I picked Kagome up bridal style and just in case the whole kiss wasn't enough to convince her I whispered a soft 'I love you' in her ear. I saw her smile and it reached her eyes making them light up enthusiastically. Slowly I headed back for camp. Everything would be alright this time.

_I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds_

_And baby the way you make my world_

_Go round_

**There it is! *Tear* Finally posted!! Now I can focus more on my Twilight story so Mirrored In My Mind will quit bugging me about it....Press the pretty little button and tell me what you think! LOL ^_^**


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